The start!

Dear All and Sundry,

Welcome to the blog that lets you have your say about the Experimental Law Variations or ELV’s as they are disaffectionately known!!!  Ooops that’ll be my bias shining through then.  However, in the spirit of fairness, this isn’t just a blog for those of us who are anti their introduction but for all rugby players.

I have taken the liberty of laying out how the current rant started below so feel free to add as you see fit.

Bouch

And so it all started on 05 August 2008 at 14:26:

From: Giles Disney

Lads

Please see attached the new ELVs for this year – I’ll be at touch / fitness for the next 2 Thursday sessions to take people through

I would suggest people start thinking about the coming season as it is approaching fast with the first set of prelims at beginning of September

Enjoy

Giles Disney

On 5 Aug 2008, at 2:47 PM

David Beckett wrote:

Old dogs, new tricks....

On 05 August 2008 at 15:46

Andy Boucher wrote:

Au contraire, David, mon vieux chien!!!

 

Old dog, old tricks.  If the "penalty" for offending against a lot of these issues is a free kick then we just cheat!  Job done!

 

It seems to have been neatly ignored that half of us old fat knackers are going to die or suffer serious injury because some idiot decided that pulling down a maul, which was considered extremely dangerous not a blink of an eye ago, is now strangely not dangerous or that there will be total chaos and that nobody but nobody in their right mind who plays the game at an amateur level thinks these laws variations are anything other than extremely ludicrous.

 

I have taken the liberty of cc'ing the poor gentleman from the IRB who has been given the job of being the man who fields all our "enquiries".  Whilst I feel for the aforementioned Mr Steve Griffiths, I feel it is our duty as honest and goodly rugby players to remind the IRB that the game is the game of the players and not anybody else.  We make up the vast majority of the paying support for the game and these laws will once again drive more players out of the game rather than expanding it.

 

I have a strange premonition that poor Mr Griffiths is going to consign our banter to the annals of the Trash Can which is sad, as perhaps cognisance of the fact that all is not well in the state of rugby due to the manifestly dictatorial way these abominations have been thrust upon us, might prompt him to potter to his metaphorical upstairs and pop the nod at Monsieur Lapassset and say "Excusez-moi mon vieux coq, mais les nouvelles loies sont merde."

 

But we can only hope!!  See you on the field of training and play for a season of "how I cheated my way to the grand championship by all and sundry"

 

Bouch 

On 11 Aug 2008, at 10:37 AM

Yazawa, Yutaka wrote:

Cher Monsieur Boucher,

 

In the spirit of the direction our beloved game seems to be taking, might I suggest that we publish the Scorpions 2009 charity calendar in which we, together with some selected invitees, are photographed in such a way that the God has intended us to look, with some indulgence of our own in beer and other assortments of good things in life?  Suggested Title: "The Gods of Homer (Simpson)" or "Nick James (as seen on HK-Guangzhou Train) with His Friends"

 

If certain members of some pink-and-flowery-shirt wearing French team can pull it off, I don't see why not us (although I did note with much indignation the inexplicable absence of our front row brethren from the pages of that best-selling French publication in San Francisco Bay Area).  Like that Adonis-looking Frederique (misspelling intended) Michalak, we might be able to take advantage of the mesmerized HK referees who would turn a blind eye to our forward passes or give us benefit of doubt when adjudicating the impossibly fine distinction between "pulling down" and "collapsing" mauls.

 

Yours,

YY

On Monday, August 11, 2008 10:40 AM

Andy Boucher wrote:

Dear All,

 

The Yute hath spake.

 

The calendar is on!

 

Bouch

On 11 Aug 2008, at 10:55 AM

Giles Disney wrote:

Please stop responding with the IRB representative on the email chain

 

Cheers

Giles Disney

On 11 August 2008 at 11:03:02 AM

Andy Boucher wrote:

Why?

They were the idiots who came up with this trousers in the first place - if they can't stand the heat don't change the laws!!!  I've helpfully added him back in.

Has anybody found out about the short penalties?  I note they are not in the new ELV's detail - and yet they are being played in the tri-nations, which I now understand is playing a different set of laws entirely until their new season kicks in.

On 11 Aug 2008, at 4:56 PM

Giles Disney wrote:

The real reason Bouch is in uproar over the ELV’s……………………….the bell tolleth for thee sire………..

“Thumbs up for new laws: Lumbering English forwards to die out like dinosaurs

By Peter Bills
Sunday, 10 August 2008

They are coming soon to a rugby ground near you. Undeniably, rugby's new laws are changing the focus of the game and, dare I say, improving it. Structures and playing philosophies honed over a hundred years are hastily being revised in light of the Experimental Law Variations. It will be fascinating to see how the northern-hemisphere teams adapt when the new season begins next month.

On the evidence of this season's Super 14 and (admittedly uncompleted) Tri-Nations, one man more than any in world rugby has fully grasped the implications of the new laws. Robbie Deans proved his assured grasp of them by steering the Crusaders to another Super 14 title, then guiding Australia to wins over South Africa in Perth and New Zealand in Sydney.

Despite New Zealand's win over Australia in the Auckland Test last weekend, a match which proved to the northern hemisphere that you can still play a structured game – even one where kicking is a fundamental part – under the new laws, Deans' stock is soaring high, becausehe is a man with an intrinsic knowledge of the new laws.

He has understood their meaning with greater alacrity than others: the northern hemisphere hardly know the new laws and have snootily dismissed them. This new game requires a tactical mastermind to grasp all the intricacies. For example, Sydney showed clearly that the influence of line-outs will fade if these changes are finally approved. There was plenty of kicking, but little to touch.”

On Monday, August 11, 2008 5:21 PM

Andy Boucher wrote:

Subject: Re: ELV's 

And so finally the truth is out.  Rugby Union is no longer a game for all sizes and all people - it is a game for ..... well it's a game apparently and probably likely to be something like Rugby League.

 

What is wrong with a lineout?  It is a feat of extraordinary athleticism and coordination and requires both tall men and strong men and bravery and trust.

 

This, my friends, is precisely why I have railed and will rail against the blatant one-eyed stupidity of this intervention.  And this is a truly sad day because now somebody has finally actually admitted what it's all about which is to make all people equal or rather let them all look and be the same.

 

Well no thank you!!  For that would mean Giles Disney, Andy Boucher, Yutaka Yazawa, Damian Babis, Sergio, Rob Gabbe and a whole host of others will be forced out of the game.  This is truly truly ridiculous

 

And stop deleting Steve Griffiths from the email list - it's annoying enough to have to put up with this trousers without having to retype his name in every time I want to make a point.  I have taken the liberty of adding a few mates based in other countries so let's hope we start the tide that turned the ship of stupidity into the path of righteousness. 

 

I'd add Peter Bills too if I could find the ignoramus' email address - clues anyone?

 

Bouch

I stand for rugby as rugby!

On 14 August 2008 at 12:16:31

Dave Beckett wrote:

A warning that some of the rules I actually agree with the sentiment of

(shock horror).  However, think they could have been changed to make it all more inclusive of the shapes and sizes that makes the game so special - rather than the 80 minute game of sevens that it is becoming.  For example (and strange coming from a kicker) having less kicks at goal is great, increasing the time actually playing rugby and trying to score tries.

However, the game may be better served by still allowing kicks to touch, so we get more of our beloved line-outs.

The pulling down of the maul is a disaster of a new ruling and I pray that the powers that be come to their senses soon.

Anyway, am in...

PS read the other day that the first rugby rules scored a try as zero, but allowed a team to "try" and kick a goal, which was one point.  One of the first England v Scotland clashes, Eng scored 6 tries to 0, but the final score was 0-0!!!  At least the game has moved on from then!